Friday night was the night most people thought they were supposed to have fun. Trouble was most people didn't know what fun was or how to have it, so things usually ended up pretty ugly.
I'm too young for Medicare and too old for women to care.
We've had to be creative to get on the ballot.
We're all worm bait waiting to happen. It's what you do while you wait that matters.
Remember, the Legislature is the joke, not our campaign.
If you elect me the first Jewish justice of the peace, I'll reduce the speed limits to 54.95!