A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

My goal was to have one husband and seven children, but it turned out to be the other way around.

The more famous an actress becomes, the less she's allowed to eat. Unless she wants to play people's mothers. And in bad clothes, yet.

Humor has been the balm of my life, but it's been reserved for those close to me, not part of the public Lana.

The thing about happiness is that it doesn't help you to grow; only unhappiness does that. So I'm grateful that my bed of roses was made up equally of blossoms and thorns. I've had a privileged, creative, exciting life, and I think that the parts that were less joyous were preparing me, testing me, strengthening me.

How does it happen that something that makes so much sense in the moonlight doesn't make any sense at all in the sunlight?

I find men terribly exciting, and any girl who says she doesn't is an anemic old maid, a streetwalker, or a saint.