Many days I don't write any code at all, and some days I spend all day writing code.

Guilty as charged. Perl is happily ugly, and happily derivative.

There is, however, a strange, musty smell in the air that reminds me of something...hmm...yes...I've got it...there's a VMS nearby, or I'm a Blit.

This job of playing God is a little too big for me. Nevertheless, someone has to do it, so I'll try my best to fake it.

Well, you can implement a Perl peek() with unpack('P',...). Once you have that, there's only security through obscurity.

The Harvard Law states: Under controlled conditions of light, temperature, humidity, and nutrition, the organism will do as it damn well pleases.

The world has become a larger place. The universe has been expanding, and Perl's been expanding along with the universe.