I inherited my ability from both parents; my mother's ability for spending money, and my father's ability for not earning it.

They lead only as the carved wooden figurehead leads the ship.

Ignorance once dispelled is difficult to reestablish.

Few of us ever test our powers of deduction, except when filling out an income tax form

Bore : A fellow who can change the subject back to his topic of conversation faster than you can change it back to yours.

Fortune knocks but once, but misfortune has much more patience.

The best intelligence test is what we do with our leisure.