The reason crime doesn't pay is that when it does, it is called a more respectable name.

Originality is the fine art of remembering what you hear but forgetting where you heard it.

Few of us ever test our powers of deduction, except when filling out an income tax form

Nobody can be perfect unless he admits his faults, but if he has faults how can he be perfect?

Equal opportunity means everyone will have a fair chance at being incompetent.

There are some men who in a fifty-fifty proposition insist on getting the hyphen too.

Real, constructive mental power lies in the creative thought that shapes your destiny, and your hour-by-hour mental conduct produces power for change in your life. Develop a train of thought on which to ride. The nobility of your life as well as your happiness depends upon the direction in which that train of thought is going.