Give a child enough rope and he will trip you up.

The machinery of government is a vast series of interlocking hierarchies riddled through and through with incompetence.

Equal opportunity means everyone will have a fair chance at being incompetent.

The devil could change. He was once an angel and may be evolving still.

I inherited my ability from both parents; my mother's ability for spending money, and my father's ability for not earning it.

Prejudice is one of the world's greatest labor-saving devices; it enables you to form an opinion without having to dig up the facts.

They lead only as the carved wooden figurehead leads the ship.