If it weren’t for my horse, I wouldn’t have spent that year in college.

The only thing dumber than a Democrat or a Republican is when those pricks work together. You see, in our two-party system, the Democrats are the party of no ideas and the Republicans are the party of bad ideas. It usually goes something like this. A Republican will stand up in Congress and say, 'I've got a really bad idea.' And a Democrat will immediately jump to his feet and declare, 'And I can make it sh*ttier.'

The core of the American public, their hearts and their minds are in the right place. And that gives me hope.

Most of the longer-term relationships I've known have been gay relationships. They seem to be able to hang out longer.

I had an iPhone and a Droid and both of them were miserable pieces of equipment.

That's the funny thing about religion: it doesn't matter what you say, you're going to upset someone.

I do have certain feelings. My feeling is that whoever is in charge, I want him out.