I like a teacher who gives you something to take home to think about besides homework.

I wanted to be a stage actress. I wanted to be a New York actress and have a community with other actors. I didn't want to get famous; I always thought getting famous was a drag on you.

Did you know, throughout the cosmos they found intelligent life forms that play to play? We are the only ones that play to win. Explains why we have more than our share of losers.

When I am happy I feel like crying, but when I am sad I don’t feel like laughing. I think it is better to be happy; then you get two feelings for the price of one.

If you can't be direct, why be?

We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.

Did you know, in the entire universe, we are the only intelligent life forms thought to have a Miss Universe contest?