My heart's pounding like I'm watching Oprah's farewell season.

If reality TV has taught us anything, it's that you can't keep people with no shame down.

I was inspired by a question that kept repeating itself in my mind: Could I really change my life? I'd spent so many days, weeks, months, and years thinking about doing things with my life, and now I wanted to know, if I committed to a goal and woke up every single day working hard at it, could I change my life?

God, three weddings in one day, I'm going to be in Spanx for 12 hours. My elastic line is gonna get infected again.

In my experience, 'let's think about it' usually ends up as me watching Solid Gold in my basement on prom night.

Lizzing is a combination of laughing and whizzing.

After all, isn't that what really draws the line between childhood and adulthood, knowing that you are solely responsible for yourself? If so, then my childhood ended at fifteen.