I was in a hotel room in Dallas, and I was jerking off so much and so sadly and pathetically, that the phone rang, and I thought it's them, they're complaining. ... "Sir, could you please stop?"

For my scale, how I grew up and live my life, I'm making plenty of money.

If I found myself alone on planet Earth, no other humans, I would have sex with a monkey in like two minutes. Two minutes. That's really not long enough to be sure you're alone on the Earth, even. That's like... I walk outside, it's- there's not much traffic. "Oh, my God, it's just me! I'm gonna have sex with a monkey right now. Oh, no-there's a person."

Most people are dead. Did you know that? It's true, out of all the people that ever were, almost all of them are dead.

I don't stop eating when I'm full. The meal isn't over when I'm full. It's over when I hate myself.

I like pressure. Pressure doesn't make me crack. It's enabling. I eat pressure, and there might be times when I get a bad feeling in my gut that this might be too much, but you feel pressure when you're not doing something, you know?

Here's how my brain works: It's stupidity, followed by self-hatred, and then further analysis.