When I was first divorced, I started dating younger women, and it was really exciting. But after a while I was like, 'This is just dumb.'
Louis C. K.My kids and I figured out that thereโs a third kind of person, and I donโt know what you call them, but itโs somebody who sees that the glass is always full because itโs half full with water and half full with nothing, so thatโs the third kind of person. I donโt know what it is.
Louis C. K.If I found myself alone on planet Earth, no other humans, I would have sex with a monkey in like two minutes. Two minutes. That's really not long enough to be sure you're alone on the Earth, even. That's like... I walk outside, it's- there's not much traffic. "Oh, my God, it's just me! I'm gonna have sex with a monkey right now. Oh, no-there's a person."
Louis C. K.There's people that say โIt's not fair You have all that stuff.โ I wasn't born with it. It was a horrible process to get to this. It took me my whole life. If you're new at this- and by โnew at it.โ I mean 15 years in, or even 20- you're just starting to grow traction. Young musicians believe they should be able to throw a band together and be famous, and anything that's in their way is unfair and evil. What are you, in your 20s, you picked up a guitar? Give it a minute.
Louis C. K.