I don't stop eating when I'm full. The meal isn't over when I'm full. It's over when I hate myself.

I don't care about the weight. You know, I'm lucky; I'm one of those people - I can eat donuts, whatever, and I just get fat.

You need to build an ability to just be yourself, and not be doing something.

Breaking records is not something you expect to be doing. That's like a sports thing, it's not usually a comedy and writing thing.

The only road to good shows is bad ones. Just go start having a bad time, and if you don't give up, you will get better.

For years, Blockbuster Video has edited movies. Like The Bad Lieutenant, when he's masturbating while the girls in the car are doing the thing. I rented it from Blockbuster and sped to that scene, and it was gone. I called up Blockbuster, and I'm like, "I got an erection, and the scene's not there."

There's been a lot of simple vilification of right-wing people. It's really easy to say, 'Well, you're Christian, you're anti-this and that, and I hate you.' But to me, it's more interesting to say, 'What is this person like and how do they really think?'