Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime. Leave the dude alone and he'll figure it out.

I found out that I'm a pretty bad father. I make a lot of mistakes and I don't know what I'm doing. But my kids love me. Go figure.

I get mad like anybody else does, but being able to laugh about getting mad is very healthy, and my kids know that.

You can't answer a kid's question. A kid never accepts any answer. A kid never says, 'Oh, thanks. I get it.'... They just keep coming with more questions - why, why, why? - until you don't even know who the fk you are anymore at the end of the conversation. It's an insane deconstruction.

I've always benefited from knowing machines well, because it's freedom, it gives you freedom, I always knew that.

Here's how my brain works: It's stupidity, followed by self-hatred, and then further analysis.

To me the goal of comedy is to just laugh, which is a really high hearted thing, visceral connection and reaction.