Well, when I was younger, I lied all the time, because once you understand the power of lying, it's really like magic because you transform reality for people.

I was in a hotel room in Dallas, and I was jerking off so much and so sadly and pathetically, that the phone rang, and I thought it's them, they're complaining. ... "Sir, could you please stop?"

Sadness is poetic. You're lucky to live sad moments. When you let yourself be sad, your body has antibodies. It has happiness that comes rushing in to meet the sadness.

I'm bored' is a useless thing to say. You live in a great, big, vast world that you've seen none percent of.

The only road to doing good shows, is doing bad shows.

People get successful and they start saying, 'Well of course I am! I was chosen! I'm special!' No, you're not.

If I found myself alone on planet Earth, no other humans, I would have sex with a monkey in like two minutes. Two minutes. That's really not long enough to be sure you're alone on the Earth, even. That's like... I walk outside, it's- there's not much traffic. "Oh, my God, it's just me! I'm gonna have sex with a monkey right now. Oh, no-there's a person."