Fathers have skills that they never use at home. You run a landscaping business and you can't dress and feed a four-year-old? Take it on!

I've had, what, two years? Probably five good years. Before that I had twenty years of uncertainty and suffering and ego destruction and poverty. All those things. That'll always outweigh the good times.

I've always benefited from knowing machines well, because it's freedom, it gives you freedom, I always knew that.

I could never sit down and write jokes.

I think you have to try and fail, because failure gets you closer to what you're good at.

You can't direct without a good crew.

I was driving in Manhattan. There's traffic, nobody's moving... The guy behind me is honking just at me. He kept yelling at me. I decided that I'm gonna argue with this guy, but I'm gonna argue about something else. I'm not having his argument; I'm having mine. So, he's like, 'Go!' And I go, 'Well give me back my jacket!' And he stopped. I was like, 'Yeah, you got my jacket! Give it back! I said you could borrow it, not have it! You're stretching it out, you fat pig! Give it back, now!' He got back in his car, and he locked his doors.