If Pac-Man had affected us as kids, we'd all be running around in dark rooms, munching pills and listening to repetitive electronic music.

All my shows are therapy, trying to navigate interesting subjects so I can work them out and to be honest and say some things are beyond the wit of this man.

If you want something Scottish, go get yourself a kilt.

I'm more pompous and self-assured and determined that if - you know - if the truth can be told so as to be understood, it will be believed.

I find it hard to get enthusiastic about hotels because, as a touring comic, I spend a lot of time in them.

I realised that to compare your insides with other people's outsides leads to unhappiness.

Britain is obsessed with political correctness.