The basic function of a comic is stand-up because it's so straightforward and simple. If the audience don't laugh, you didn't do your job. I've had some audiences where I didn't care if they laughed or not because they were either too drunk or stupid.

Britain is obsessed with political correctness.

The most successful comics are always the hardest-working ones.

Eventually, somewhere - be it on the Internet or somewhere else - I will host some version of 'The Daily Show.'

Offence is important; that's how you know you care about things. Imagine a life where you're not offended. So dull.

If you go on stage with an agenda, you have to accept not everyone's going to agree with it.

I realised that to compare your insides with other people's outsides leads to unhappiness.