He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever.

I am an anti-imperialist. I am opposed to having the eagle put its talons on any other land.

O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain.

First catch your Boer, then kick him.

The Germans are exceedingly fond of Rhine wines; they are put up in tall, slender bottles, and are considered a pleasant beverage. One tells them from vinegar by the label.

The cayote is a living, breathing allegory of Want. He is always hungry. He is always poor, out of luck and friendless. The meanest creatures despise him, and even the fleas would desert him for a velocipede.

We can't always have the beautiful aspect of things. Let us make the most of our sights that are beautiful and let the others go