The humorous story is told gravely; the teller does his best to conceal the fact that he even dimly suspects that there is anything funny about it.

Only laughter can blow [a colossal humbug] to rags and atoms at a blast. Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.

The timid man yearns for full value and demands a tenth. The bold man strikes for double value and compromises on par.

The human being places sexual intercourse above all other joys, but leaves it out of his heaven.

Man is the only animal that is cruel. It kills just for the sake of it.

It has always been a peculiarity of the human race that it keeps two sets of morals in stock-the private and the real, and the public and the artificial.

There are people who think that honesty is always the best policy. This is a superstition. There are times when the appearance of it is worth six of it.