If husbands could realize what large returns of profit may be gotten out of a wife by a small word of praise paid over the counter when the market is just right, they would bring matters around the way they wish them much oftener than they usually do. Arguments are unsafe with wives, because they examine them; but they do not examine compliments. One can pass upon a wife a compliment that is three-fourths base

If God had meant for us to be naked, we'd have been born that way.

I have carried a revolver; lots of us do, but they are the most innocent things in the world.

A wise man does not waste so good a commodity as lying for naught.

A baby is an angel whose wings decrease as his legs increase.

There is no such thing as an ordinary life.

I have attended operas, whenever I could not help it, for fourteen years now; I am sure I know of no agony comparable to the listening to an unfamiliar opera.