Teaching is like trying to hold 35 corks underwater at once.

They did not know it was impossible so they did it

If it would not look too much like showing off, I would tell the reader where New Zealand is.

The fear of lightning is one of the most distressing infirmities a human being can be afflicted with. It is mostly confined to women, but now and then you find it in a little dog, and sometimes a man.

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.

The gentle reader will never, never know what a consummate ass he can become until he goes abroad.

It takes your enemy and your friend, working together, to hurt you to the heart: the one to slander you and the other to get the news to you.