Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre, but they are more deadly in the long run.

What, sir, would the people of the earth be without woman? They would be scarce, sir, almighty scarce.

The reason why truth is so much stranger than fiction is that there is no requirement for it to be consistent.

July 4. Statistics show that we lose more fools on this day than in all the other days of the year put together. This proves, by the number left in stock, that one fourth of July per year is now inadequate, the country has grown so

The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane.

Greece is a bleak, unsmiling desert, without agriculture, manufactures or commerce, apparently. What supports its poverty-stricken people or its Government, is a mystery.

Whatever you say, say it with conviction