There are several kinds of stories, but only one difficult kind-the humorous.

The public is the only critic whose judgment is worth anything at all.

We despise all reverences and all objects of reverence which are outside the pale of our list of sacred things. And yet, with strange inconsistency, we are shocked when other people despise and defile the things which are holy to us.

The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out, the conservative adopt.

Yes - en I's rich now, come to look at it. I owns myself, en I's wuth eight hund'd dollars. I wisht I had de money, I wouldn' want no mo'.

If you are with the quality, or at a funeral, or trying to go to sleep when you ain't sleepy - if you are anywheres where it won't do for you to scratch, why you will itch all over in upwards of a thousand places.

To stand still is to fall behind.