Please do as I requested, only if you can do so with the joy of a little child feeding a hungry duck. Please do not do as I request if there is any taint of fear of punishment if you don't. Please do not do as I request to buy my love, that, is hoping that I will love you more if you do. Please do not do as I request if you will feel guilty if you don't. Please do not do as I request if you will feel shameful. And certainly do not do as I request out of any sense of duty or obligation.

However impressed we may be with NVC concepts, it is only through practice and application that our lives are transformed.

Every message, regardless of form or content, is an expression of a need.

Behind intimidating messages are simply people appealing to us to meet their needs.

NVC is language, thoughts, communication skills and means of influence that serve my desire to do three things: 1) to liberate myself from cultural learning that is in conflict with how I want to live my life. 2) to empower myself to connect with myself and others in a way that makes compassionate giving natural. 3) to empower myself to create structures that support compassionate giving.

I don't think you can have an authentic connection when one person is diagnosing the other.

In our culture, most of us have been trained to ignore our own wants and to discount our needs.