Needs are never conflicting. When we say that, we are only saying that at the moment we aren't seeing how both needs can be met. That leaves an opening. When you think in the way I'm suggesting, you'll often find a way to get most needs met simultaneously.

Punishment is the root of violence on our planet.

It's harder to empathize with those who appear to possess more power, status, or resources.

Any time you throw pain at a Jackal without a clear present request, within a millisecond he'll jump in.

To be able to hear our own feelings and needs and to empathize with them can free us from depression.

When we express our needs indirectly through the use of evaluations, interpretations, and images, others are likely to hear criticism. When people hear anything that sounds like criticism, they tend to invest their energy in self-defense or counterattack. It's important that when we address somebody that we're clear what we want back.

Anger is a signal that you're distracted by judgmental or punitive thinking, and that some precious need of yours is being ignored.