Never question the beauty of what you are saying because someone reacts with pain, judgment, criticism. It just means they have not heard you.

Always hear the 'Yes' in the 'No'.

Everything we do is in service of our needs. When this one concept is applied to our view of others, we'll see that we have no real enemies, that what others do to us is the best possible thing they know to do to get their needs met.

All violence is the result of people tricking themselves into believing that their pain derives from other people and that consequently those people deserve to be punished.

The punitive use of force tends to generate hostility and to reinforce resistance to the very behavior we are seeking.

When we express our needs indirectly through the use of evaluations, interpretations, and images, others are likely to hear criticism. When people hear anything that sounds like criticism, they tend to invest their energy in self-defense or counterattack. It's important that when we address somebody that we're clear what we want back.

Whether I praise or criticize someone's action, I imply that I am their judge, that I'm engaged in rating them or what they have done.