While we may not consider the way we talk to be 'violent,' our words often lead to hurt and pain, whether for others or for ourselves.

However impressed we may be with NVC concepts, it is only through practice and application that our lives are transformed.

NVC gives us tools and understanding to create a more peaceful state of mind.

NVC is language, thoughts, communication skills and means of influence that serve my desire to do three things: 1) to liberate myself from cultural learning that is in conflict with how I want to live my life. 2) to empower myself to connect with myself and others in a way that makes compassionate giving natural. 3) to empower myself to create structures that support compassionate giving.

Use anger as a wake-up call to unmet needs.

Have you ever been surfing? Imagine you're on your surfboard now, waiting for the big one to come. Get ready to get carried with that energy. Now, here it comes. That's empathy. No words - just being with that energy. When I connect with what's alive in another person, I have feelings similar to when I'm surfing.

We use NVC to evaluate ourselves in ways that engender growth rather than self-hatred.