Oftentimes, what seems to be a street lunatic charging at me spouting gibberish turns out to be a devoted 'Simpsons' fan quoting their favorite line.

If people only knew how much I secretly hated them, they'd love me for holding it in.

Part of the fun of being alive is knowing that you're annoying the hell out of someone else.

Did you hear something?" "No." "Did I hear something?" "...I don't know.

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fit in eight hours of TV a day.

The thing that makes me happiest about Simpsons Illustrated are all the drawings that we get from readers. I wish we could print them all. They're really imaginative. They show a lot of hard work.

Do my worst, eh? Smithers, release the robotic Richard Simmons." --Mr. Burns