Of all the forms of exercise that I have done, Power Plate® training is the most concise. If I start my session at 9.30am, I know I can be at my desk by 10.15am and I can even fit in a workout before rehearsals. Power Plate® exercise is not at all intimidating, and I know that in a short session I have had a complete workout.

A tortoise is, I suppose, a Jewish pet. It knows its place. Out on the lawn. It doesn't bark. It doesn't tear the Dralon.

My idea of a good work-out is two hours spent worrying about the bags under my eyes.

Are you sitting comfortably? Then get up. This is no time for sloth.

Jewish Alzheimer's is forgetting everything except a grudge.

You know the worst thing about oral sex ? The view.

Chutzpah' is best defined as a small boy peeing through someone's letter box, then ringing the doorbell to ask how far it went.