One of the weaknesses of the company now is it is a bit cheap and cheerful and overly nasty, and that reflects my personality.

The chattering bloody classes, or what I call the liberal Guardian readers, they're all buying SUVs to drive around London. I smile at these loons who drive their SUVs down to Sainsbury's and buy kiwi fruit, flown in from New Zealand for Christ sakes. They're the equivalent of environmental nuclear bombs!

University is the best couple of years of your life. Nowhere else can you drink and chase as many birds.

The airline business is it is mostly run by a bunch of spineless nincompoops who actually don't want to stand up to the environmentalists and call them the lying wankers that they are.

The French have never produced a great philosopher. Great wine maybe, but no great philosophers.

The European Union spends most of its time either suing me, torturing me, criticizing me or condemning me for lowering the cost of air travel all over Europe.

People say the customer is always right, but you know what - they're not. Sometimes they are wrong and they need to be told so.