If every witty thing that's said was true, Oscar Wilde, the world would worship You!

Life's saving graces are love, pleasure, laughter ... wisdom, it seems, is for the Hereafter.

When Donald Trump becomes president, he'll fly on a jumbo jet rebadged Hair Force One. It will be oversized to contain his massive ego, and will have all the latest and greatest blowdryer technology.

Donald Trump accused Huma Abedin of sharing state secrets with her husband. I think Trump clearly lacks a sense of Huma.

The slogan of the American Civil Rights Movement was "We shall overcome!" Donald Trump's new campaign slogan is "We shall overcomb!"

Many presidents have believed in God, but Donald Trump evidently believes that he is God.

What do we get when the Donald exposes his enormous ass? A trump roast.