With each passing year, one has less to say, and knows better how to say it.

People find it hard to be both comic and serious, though life manages it easily enough.

No matter how many Christmas presents you give your child, there's always that terrible moment when he's opened the very last one. That's when he expects you to say, 'Oh yes, I almost forgot,' and take him out and show him the pony.

Healthy parakeets have the nervous energy of tennis players.

My doctor is nice; every time I see him, I'm ashamed of what I think of doctors in general.

If you hate your lot but wouldn't trade it, it's not your lot you hate.

If you have to do it every day, for God's sake learn to do it well.