A hypochondriac is one who has a pill for everything except what ails him.

Your money, or your life. We know what to do when a burglar makes this demand of us, but not when God does.

Nobody knows the trouble we've seen-but we keep trying to tell them.

One day you are an apprentice, and everybody's pet; the next, you are coldly expected to deliver. There is never sufficient warning that the second day is coming.

They threaten me with lung cancer, and still I smoke and smoke. If they'd only threaten me with hard work, I might stop.

Vanity, revenge, loneliness, boredom, all apply: lust is one of the least of the reasons for promiscuity.

Most of us can easily do two things at once; what's all but impossible is to do one thing at once.