The key to eating healthy is not eating any food that has a TV commercial.

Bears are simultaneously so graceful and so strong. Bears know who they are, but they often don’t know who you are, which is why they kill you.

You've got to remember that improvisers are writers and actors and directors all simultaneously. That's what's happening in real time because you're writing on your feet, and you are acting out the words and you are directing what the staging is. You're deciding what staging is.

Sometimes when my fans come up to me, they think it's going to be entertaining, like I'm going to tell jokes or do bits, and then instead of that I end up talking about really mundane things with my fans, and then they're kind of like, "This is boring. I want to go talk to somebody else." I think I bore my fans to death by over-talking to them.

The list of fun and easily fixed brain diseases is very short.

I feel like everyone wants to make a movie that they feel passionate about watching.

What I write is emotionally honest and truthful as the human experience can be, to make people feel less alone, or at least that's the hope.