Art is socialism but life is capitalism.
I went to the doctor, and they found something in my bladder. And whenever they find something, it's never anything good like, "We found something in your bladder AND IT'S SEASON TICKETS TO THE YANKEES!!"
I feel like everyone wants to make a movie that they feel passionate about watching.
Saturday night is perfect for writers because other people have "plans.
Does anyone know a word that rhymes with shark?
I went to a funeral recently, and they handed out Kleenex before the funeral. Which I thought was cocky.