Everyone tries to get you to dance at clubs. They come up to you and say "You gotta dance! you gotta dance!" And then I dance, and they're like, "Not like that!"
Falling in love is a completely transcendent experience. It's like eating pizza-flavored ice cream
I like 'Donnie Darko;' it's a cool take on dreams and sleep.
I've read that Steven Wright's style was born out of genuine nervousness.
I don't drink a lot. My family calls me an old soul. And my friends call me a pussy.
Comedy is tragedy plus time, but the time is different for everybody.