Mother Nature is a freaky lady who probably created pot so she could spend all her time smoking it.

It's not hard to marginalize people when they've already done it to themselves.

Fooling laymen with science is sometimes so easy it should be criminal.

I wanted the truth, and I wanted the news, and I'd be damned before I settled for anything less.

Is there any time in your life when you do not feel the need for caffeine?" "Sure. Sometimes I'm asleep.

Running around in the grass near an unsecured structure and a bunch of trees is a good way of taking yourself out of the gene pool.

Didn't we talk about this?" "HAIL!" "That isn't an answer." I planted my hands on my hips. "Was there a reason for shoving the gummy bears off the counter? Did they tell you they were suicidal? On second thought," I raised a hand, palm out, "don't answer that. If the candy is talking, I don't want to know.