I don't know who St. Valentine was, but I hope he died alone, surrounded by couples.

I'm very much in denial that I can't dance. I really go for it, which is almost more embarrassing.

No one likes a show-off, but if parallel parking was an Olympic sport, I would get gold, no probs.

We are all unique, which makes us beautiful; so never despair, and just chill the hell out about it all.

Get me a skinny frappuccino. I have no idea what that is - I would like to think you would be presented with a tiny Italian man.

Life is a series of embarrassing moments which leave you feeling alone in your confusion and shame

some of my happiest funniest times have been spent in offices. Perhaps because the work was mudane, even the tiniest of distractions become wildly hilarious and wonderful. Actually, I'd say that 90 per cent of my doubled-over-gasping-with-laughther-laughing-so-much-that-you-can't-breathe-and-you-think-you-might-die laughing has occurred during slow days in offices.