You need to know that even as life develops in superficially disappointing ways, there is still fun to be had.

Get me a skinny frappuccino. I have no idea what that is - I would like to think you would be presented with a tiny Italian man.

I have a fantastic method for anti-ageing. It's eating. Plumps out your skin beautifully.

No one likes a show-off, but if parallel parking was an Olympic sport, I would get gold, no probs.

If I did better... I'd be God.

I think it's sad when people stop dreaming, or start losing hope. Because holding onto the bonkers dream might just turn out to be the most marvellous thing you ever did.

Live in hope. Because things do happen. Things do change. Worry really is futile. Don't fear the future. Dreams do come true.