Here's a thought for sweat shop owners: Air Conditioning. Problem solved.

I want to ride in a cold air balloon. "This isn't going anywhere!"

It's very dangerous to wave to people you don't know because what if they don't have hands? They'll think you're cocky.

Imagine if the headless horseman had a headless horse. That would be chaos. I would think that if you were the headless horseman's horse, you would be very confused. "I don't think this dude can see."

Sometimes I wake up and I think I should start wearing a beret, but I don't do it. One day I'm gonna, though. You bet your ass, I will have a beret on. That's ridiculous, but it's true. I always fight with wearing a beret.

Y'know, you can't please all the people all the time... and last night, all those people were at my show.

I'm a mumbler. If I'm walking with a friend, and I say something, he says, "What?" So I say it again, and he says, "What?" Really, it's just some insignificant stuff I'm saying, but now I'm yelling, "That tree is far away!"