It's weird... people say they're not like apes. Now how do you explain football then?

You know when you see an advertisement for a casino, and they have a picture of a guy winning money? That's false advertising, because that happens the least. That's like if you're advertising a hamburger, they could show a guy choking. "This is what happened once."

If you want to talk to me after the show, I'd be surprised.

People ask me for my autograph after a show. I'm not famous, I think they're messing with me. I think they're trying to make me late for something.

I know people who believe in ghosts but don't believe in themselves.

I saw a guy juggling chain saws, it was cool, unless something needed to be sawed down, then it's annoying.

Why are there no "during" pictures?