I wish I had played team sports. I think every kid should. Teamwork builds character - teaches people about leadership and cooperation.

If I had a time machine I would go back 30 years and show up at my grandmother's apartment before the gargantuan meals she would serve and I would help her.

Yes, I still love 'South Park,' but I also love morning TV now.

When it comes to war, we focus more on the mainstream coverage of the event, rather than the event itself. People dying is never funny. Protest puppets are always funny.

I wish I had played team sports. I think every kid should. Teamwork builds character - teaches people about leadership and cooperation.

Wheel of Fortune was an important SAT prep for me.

I have a Keurig coffee maker, which is really kind of a luxury. It was given to me by an ex. I realized when I'm feeling sentimental, I'll gently, tenderly press the button. Then when I remember he dumped me, I punch it.