Talent is the gift plus the passion - a desire to succeed so intense that no force on earth can stop it.

How long do you want to wait until you start enjoying life? When you're sixty-five you get social security.

Everyone thinks they can write a play; you just write down what happened to you. But the art of it is drawing from all the moments of your life.

Money brings some happiness. But after a certain point, it just brings more money.

Sports is the only entertainment where, no matter how many times you go back, you never know the ending.

New York is not Mecca. It just smells like it.

You must realize that honorary degrees are given generally to people whose SAT scores were too low to get them into schools the regular way. As a matter of fact, it was my SAT scores that led me into my present vocation in life, comedy.