Never underestimate the stimulation of eccentricity.

Gee, what a terrific party. Later on we'll get some fluid and embalm each other.

Take care of him. And make him feel important. And if you can do that, you'll have a happy and wonderful marriage. Like two out of every ten couples.

The body of a young woman is God's greatest achievement...Of course, He could have built it to last longer but you can't have everything.

If no one ever took risks, Michaelangelo would have painted the Sistine floor.

You must realize that honorary degrees are given generally to people whose SAT scores were too low to get them into schools the regular way. As a matter of fact, it was my SAT scores that led me into my present vocation in life, comedy.

Once you start compromising your thoughts, you're a candidate for mediocrity.