Yeah man, they call gambling a disease, but it's the only disease where you can win a bunch of money.

I got my computer. The great thing about the computer is that you only need enough money to buy a computer and some food, and you're all right. I don't have to go to premières.

The reason we have few friends in adversity, is, because we have no true ones in prosperity.

There are two indiscretions that generally distinguish fools: a readiness to report whatever they hear, and a practice of communicating with secrecy what is commonly understood.

Yeah man, they call gambling a disease, but it's the only disease where you can win a bunch of money.

Most men appear wiser in their doubts than in their belief.

I started on 'Saturday Night Live' the same time Conan started on 'Late Night.' We just had a relationship because I would be upstairs in the studio and whenever he couldn't get a guest - which was often back then since he was just starting out - he would just call me down to be a guest.