One rule which woe betides the banker who fails to heed it/Never lend any money to anybody unless they don't need it.

A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips stick.

Authors of all races, be they Greeks, Romans, Teutons, or Celts, Can't seem just to say anything is the thing it is but have to go out of their way to say that it is like something else.

To Tom Carlson or his dog-depending on whose taste it best suits.

All husbands are alike, but they have different faces so you can tell them apart.

I'm like a backward berry, Unripened on the vine, For all my friends are fifty, And I'm only forty-nine.

Sleep is perverse as human nature, Sleep is perverse as a legislature, Sleep is as forward as hives or goiters, And where it is least desired, it loiters.