If there is one thing I dislike, it is the man who tries to air his grievances when I wish to air mine.
P. G. WodehouseLady Glossip: Mr. Wooster, how would you support a wife? Bertie Wooster: Well, I suppose it depends on who's wife it was, a little gentle pressure beneath the elbow while crossing a busy street usually fits the bill.
P. G. WodehouseWell, why do you want a political career? Have you ever been in the House of Commons and taken a good square look at the inmates? As weird a gaggle of freaks and sub-humans as was ever collected in one spot.
P. G. WodehouseThere are moments, Jeeves, when one asks oneself, 'Do trousers matter?'" "The mood will pass, sir.
P. G. WodehouseIt was a silver cow. But when I say 'cow', don't go running away with the idea of some decent, self-respecting cudster such as you may observe loading grass into itself in the nearest meadow. This was a sinister, leering, Underworld sort of animal, the kind that would spit out of the side of its mouth for twopence.
P. G. Wodehouse