This is the most elaborate and luxurious method of convincing others that you can cook. Take everybody out on your yacht until they're green in the face. Then you can rave for weeks about your sauce marinara and no one will gainsay you.

Smoking crack is a way for people who couldn't afford college to study the works of Charles Darwin.

All change is bad. But sometimes it has to be done.

Some people are better imagined in one's bed than found there in the morning.

As a result of that, and as a result of friendship, I don't think we've ever been competitive. I mean, there's probably a very good reason Hunter [S. Thompson] isn't jealous of me.

Drugs have taught an entire generation of kids the metric system

I'm a rather decisive type.