Sometimes you need a B-2 bomber and sometimes you need your mother.

Walt is dead. And, after a couple of hours at Epcot, you'll wish you were, too.

In case we have to shoot Democrats. It happened during the Civil War, and it could happen again.

Many reporters, when they go to work in the nation's capital, begin thinking of themselves as participants in the political process instead of glorified stenographers.

Coffee and cigarettes are much better if you want an instant breakfast.

I have three children and three dogs. You put them in a Prius, you know? People who have a Prius obviously have no life! No wife, no kids, no pets - there's no room in there for anything!

Ann Coulter to me is someone who says things that I say all the time, but I say them at three in the morning when I'm drunk as a monkey. She says them at three in the afternoon stone sober in bright daylight.