Journalists are notoriously easy to kid. All you have to do is speak to a journalist in a very serious tone of voice, and he will be certain that you are either telling the truth or a big, important lie.

The very existence of the bicycle is an offense to reason and wisdom.

America wasn't founded so that we could all be better. America was founded so we could all be anything we damned well pleased.

It remains to be seen which program will cause greater societal damage: China's one-child policy or America's one-parent policy.

To mistrust science and deny the validity of the scientific method is to resign your job as a human. You'd better go look for work as a plant or wild animal.

There's nothing more oily and cynical in politics than telling the truth.

The only really firm rule of taste about cross dressing is that neither sex should ever wear anything they haven't yet figured out how to go to the bathroom in.